You can’t enter a newsagent these days without coming across magazine titles that demand you to ‘loose those last five pounds’ or ‘become ab fab in three weeks’, all ‘just in time for summer 2018.’ The way to the perfect beach body is often portrayed as a complicated one, littered with sacrifices, requiring a huge […]
With January almost done and dusted and the beginning of February looming, chickening out of your New Year’s resolutions is an almost certainty. By the end of this month, about 35% of all our resolutions will have been broken. By the summer, more than half of all resolutions will have gone out of the window. […]
I have been feeling a little sluggish of late. Ok, whom am I kidding? I am feeling A LOT sluggish. Blobbish. I am the Blobb. Poke me in the stomach and see the wobbles reaching a 6 on the Richter scale. This is not about losing weight, or about a late New Year’s resolution. I […]
I recently came across the blog of Alice, a 24 year old London mum-to-be. Reading through her entire blog, I was taken back to my own pregnancy. Her worries about the baby not being there any more (stop testing, Alice!), her battle with tiredness and the effect a great dose of hormones can have on […]
Since becoming a mother, my days have been filled with much more housewife stuff than they used to be. In my childless, naïve and slightly illusive mind, I had envisioned channelling all my energy into looking after the baby, the husband and our home, once I had left that high-profile but mundane city job behind me. Our spotlessly clean house would smell of freshly baked bread, baby food would be cooked by myself and every night there would be a healthy and delicious dinner awaiting Big M when he’d come home. HAHA.
Having renovated a house recently, I can honestly say that watching paint dry is more exciting than attempting to diet. The last diet (remember Fat Smash: peas and lentils and lentils and peas) was ditched after four days. Four days! Instead we went to New York and tucked into pancakes (sky-high pancake piles soaked in maple syrup, accompanied by fried eggs and bacon), pizza and gigantic chocolate chip cookies. Only to be followed by the New England diet, i.e. lobsters and melted butter, corn on the cob and pumpkin pie. I know this is going to surprise you, but I STILL haven’t lost those last three pounds.
To encourage further shrinkage, I have recently replaced my beloved Pain au Chocolat with muesli for breakfast. So when I absent-mindedly read the text on the muesli box, the scales fell from my eyes. (!) My diet was missing an essential ingredient. And these folks even have the nerves to boast about not having it in their product. At all.
I had a breakthrough yesterday. I am back in my jeans! Ok, only in those that used to fit the loosest, but it is a start.
Two weeks of stuffing myself with white bread and butter left me feeling a little bloated, to say the least. I didn’t want to be a killjoy, but I also didn’t want to demotivate my dieting self. That’s why I didn’t hit the scales when I came back form our delicious vacation. I am not as brave as Fab Brunette, sorry guys!
Two weeks on Île de Ré, and not only did I gain a tan, but also a few extra inches around the waist. My trousers appear to hug my hips in a tight embrace. The two stick together like first time lovesick teenagers. Let’s hope this summer romance isn’t more than a short-lived fling. You ask how this could happen? An analysis of photo material should bring light into this sombre affair.
Don’t worry. It hasn’t hit us. I am just trying to come up with a sensible plan to keep it as far away from us as possible. And if that means I am going to sit on my 5 extra pounds for a little longer, so it shall be.
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